What Not to Say

3 Dec

When confronted with the hock of  another person’s cancer diagnosis, a lot of people manage to stick their foot in their mouth.  All of these have been thrown my way at one time or another (and are to be completely and totally avoided at all costs):

  • OH NO!!!!! (accompanied by a hand over the mouth and a jump backwards).
  • You’ve got to be kidding me.
  • No way!
  • But you look so healthy!
  • Do you think G-d is punishing you for converting to Judaism?
  • I knew G-d would punish you for converting to Judaism!
  • You should have prayed more.
  • Jesus will heal you if you pray hard enough.
  • I told you that you should have spent your time reading the Bible instead of Harry Potter.
  • My sister-in-law/friend/dad had the same kind of cancer and here is a list of all the awful things he/she suffered through.
  • What can I do to help? (too vague, not seen as a genuine offer of help)
  • Well, I guess you’ll never get married now (said to a young, single patient).
  • You’ve gained/lost so much weight.  You must have an eating disorder!
  • I read about this miracle cure and you absolutely have to try it!
  • Are you trying my miracle cure?
  • Why aren’t you trying my miracle cure?  Don’t you want to live?

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